Do We Need a Really Good 5 Center Cigar?

Johnny-on-the-Spot … by John Foster …

President Woodrow Wilson’s Vice-President Thomas Marshall is credited with the statement, “What this country needs is a really good five cent cigar.

Marshall, who was also the 27th Indiana governor served as the 28th vice-president of the nation.

BTW, he’s also the only U.S. Vice President to have been exclusively targeted for assassination.

Andrew Johnson, President Lincoln’s V-P was the first.

Marshall’s cigar quote supposedly came during a Senate debate on the nation’s needs.

The Vice-President is said to have leaned over and muttered to a colleague, “What this country needs is a really good 5 cent cigar.”

Now, in today’s economy, that cigar might sent you back anywhere from $10 to $50.

Marshall’s statement was actually a figure of speech for “getting down to earth, buckling down to thrift and work.”

“The mention of “work” would prompt America’s first TV “beatnik”, Maynard G. Krebs to sort of yelp, “Work!?” when anyone suggested that he get a job.

The “G” stood for “Walter”, Maynard’ aunt who “didn’t spell too good.”

Maynard introduced Americans to “beatniks” and his thought-pausing word “like” and the phrase, “You Rang?”

He was Dobie Gillis’ (Dwayne Hickman) best friend on the TV series, “The Many Loves of Dobie Gillis” which aired from 1959-1963.

“Beatniks” participated in a social movement in the 50’s through the early 60’s stressing artistic self-expression and rejection of the social mores of the conventional society.

They also played bongos.

In the 60’s, Maynard would have been a “hippie” or a “flower child”.

Today he might be a “bohemian” or a “naturalist”.

“Getting down to earth” doesn’t seem to be a thought that is really popular today any more than “buckling down to thrift and work.”

However, as recently as 1981, Kool and the Gang sang “Get Down on It” but that wasn’t quite the same as “getting down to earth.”

So maybe we need something other than a really good five cent cigar to cure what ails us.

However, Mark Twain is quoted as saying. “If heaven has no cigars, I shall not go there!”

In light of today’s political landscape, remember that Ulysses S. Grant stated, “Cheap cigars come in handy; they stifle the odor of cheap politicians.

Today’s reality is the fact our politicians aren’t cheap.

Some say they’re the best that money can buy.

Ninety-six percent of the 535 members of the 118th Congress have college degrees.

The nationwide average for the rest of us is 35%.

Pay off those student loans you say?

Thirty percent of U.S. Representatives have law degrees; 51% of our Senators do.

Only 23 members of the House have nothing beyond a high school diploma or a GED.

Is that a “true” House of Representatives?

The hue and cry from the masses is “term limits”.

With this current Congress, the average length of service in the House is 8.5 years, a little more than 4 two-year terms.

In the Senate, that figure is 11.2 years, just short of 2 full six-year terms.

Hmm.

Fifty-seven percent of Americans know the party affiliation of their U-S Representative but only 37% can name them.

But the typical American will almost always blame “the other guy’s politician” and as the one who needs to go.

I believe “term limits” are for American voters who don’t want to be part of the process to see that good people get elected.

Don’t limit terms.

Limit campaign funding and what can be spent on advertising and commercials.

That might level the political field a bit.

Besides, I have a huge dislike for those negative ads from “Political Action Committees”, telling me what’s wrong with the “other guy” instead of what’s good for this actual candidate.

Maybe then, your candidate might win and you could light up a “victory cigar.”

A really good 5 center cigar.