Of Human Beings and Lima Beans…

Johnny-on-the-Spot

Have you had enough COVID-19 talk to last your for a a lifetime?

Is the coronavirus  conversation making you “wacky doo-doo”?

How’s that work-at-home and self-isolation going?

Some observations.

It appears COVID-19 affects the “common sense” portion of the brain.

Everyday I read and hear something that makes me wonder how some folks were able to find their way to work and back home again when we could do that a few weeks ago.

I heard a public officials decry the increase in the number of coronavirus cases being reported as a reason to stay “hunkered down” ad infinitum.

Hold on a second.

Aren’t we testing more people today than we did the day before, the week before, the month  before?

Seems reasonable to me that the more people you test for something, the more likely it is that you’ll find more infected folks.

There’s little doubt in my mind that before this pandemic had all the media attention that it now has, we had lots of folks with flu and pneumonia-symptoms that we just clumped into “flu and/or pneumonia” cases.

Okay.

I’m not a doctor.

But I did stay at a Holiday Express once.

I’m also finding about a 10% factor on Facebook.

In other words, about one in 10 offerings are worth reading.

I have been happy to see a lot of “puns” showing up.

One of the best was sports fans, hungry for something to watch can tune in to the “World Origami Championships”.

It’s on Paperview”.

That’s a keeper.

Because so much media attention is centered on the Wuhan flu, the devastating storms and tornadoes in the Deep South this spring are barely getting a sniff.

Put one of those twisters in NYC and it’s a whole new game.

You know what else was largely ignored?

“Lima Bean Appreciation Day”.

It was Monday, April 20th.

Do you like Lima beans?

I don’t think I’ve eaten a Lima bean since I got married.

Momma Foster used to place those before us on occasion while growing up.

I’ll bet she included them with my “favorite” supper…fried liver and creamed potatoes.

(Pardon me while I gag in memory.)

As I recall, she put a little salt and butter on them.

Lima beans required a big glass of milk to chase each bean with a swig of cow juice.

We Americans eat less than a half pound of Lima beans in a year and I think farmers plant less than 40,000 acres of them in a year.

The vast majority of the white, creamy white or green Lima beans are frozen or canned and except for a few summer farm markets, it’s sort of rare to find fresh ones available.

Here’s an interesting fact.

Raw Lima beans, when they decompose, create a cyanide gas.

However, cooking them 10 minutes makes them edible.

That still makes me edgy.

Are you living on the edge if you only cook them for 8 minutes?

There are 3 major groups of the oval, kidney-shaped beans; dwarf, small and large.

Some folks also refer to Lima beans as “Chad beans” or Butterbeans”.

Lima beans originally came from Peru as far back as 6,000BC.

The capital city of Peru is “Lima”, pronounced “Lee-muh” unlike the western Ohio city, Lima, which is pronounced “Lye-muh” like the bean.

You can always tell if a national newscaster is not from the Midwest because he or she will call Lima, Ohio “Lee-muh”.

Tomato?

Tomahto?

Potatoe?

Potahtoe?

Let’s call the whole thing off.

Lima beans seem to have a lot of that good, old American “pioneer spirit”, too.

The flowers of the plant have both male  and female reproductive organs.

That way, if the bees don’t get the job done, Lima beans will pollinate themselves.

Lima beans are rich in dietary fibers, proteins, Vitamin B and several minerals.

Look at a Lima bean and you’ll understand the scientific name; “Phaseoulous Lunatus” which is Latin for “half moon”.

Now, allow me to take you back to my childhood in the late 50’s.

I was in a Cub Scout troop and Jeanne Gardner was our “den mother”.

Her son, Lon, was one of my earliest childhood friends.

We did a play on nutrition with a few song and dance routines.

To this day, I can’t remember what plant or food I played (probably corn).

But we closed the show with Jeanne’s little boy Jeff, who was presented as “baby Lima bean”.

He was either carried or he waddled out, unsteady under his own power.

It probably brought down the house as the curtains closed on the stage of Wooster Heights Elementary School.

Today it would be on YouTube.

It might rival the “Tiger King” for viewership in this expansive, yet limited true entertainment era.

So, you probably missed “Lima Bean Appreciation Day” on the 20th.

And, even though they’re not one of my favorite beans, I do have a new-found respect for them.

Am I going to dash out and insist we have some for supper soon?

Put ’em on the menu with fried liver and creamed potatoes?

No.

But as much as I might not like Lima beans, I’m finding I might like them better than some “human beans” I’ve encountered.

What say you?